How I ended up being single
*This is an entry for the February Blog of the Month Competition.*
In this society of interwoven family system that we live in, being married, engaged or committed is not an easy job. However, staying single is even more difficult. We love poking our nose into other's business, ignoring the mess that is going in our own life. Be it a family gathering or any wedding that you are attending, all the aunties have their eyes on you. If a girl is married, when is she having a baby or how is she being treated by her in-laws and a never-ending plethora of questions follows. But if she is 25 and still single, OMG, that trigger a rapid-fire alarm in aunties’ mind asking you five 'W's, who, when, what, where, why.
Call it my luck, I was born surrounded by the same aunties. When I first opened my eyes, my Phupho declared that I would make a perfect match for her son who was 12 years at that time. It was after listening to this that I cried and my APGAR score increased. Thanks to that Umair Bhai who later eloped with his class fellow when I was in school. I could set myself up with some of my cousins that I like if only I weren't calling them ‘Bhai' since childhood.
When I crossed twenty, my mom started taking me to weddings and to small gatherings treating me as an adult while deep down I am still the three years old who loves wheat flavored Cerelac. I have experienced the typical questions aunties ask in gatherings to all the potentially single girls, and if they are doctors, it adds to the fuel. I was attending a wedding when an Aunty asked if I was single and started reading the CV of her son. I gave a fake smile and changed the table, ending up sitting with an apparently decent lady. She asked if I had graduated. Without thinking about what she had asked, I said, “happily married, have a beautiful daughter.” “But you look,” she astonishingly said, “old enough to have two kids!” I replied to her sentence with a sarcastic smile. In that instant, my mom showed out of nowhere and introduced me to the same lady I already had lied to. She was her friend and knew me. I was really embarrassed.
Even though my Instagram is flooded with pictures of people getting married, nikah-fied or at least engaged, I comfortably lie in bed, binge-watching Netflix originals and eating noodles while commenting MashaAllah on somebody changing her status from single to married. Whereas my mom is from head to heels trying to find me a perfect match. She asks me every week, “tell me freely beta if you like any of your class-fellows”. I tell her every time that we don't have Boys in FJ. A silence of a few seconds intervenes before I burst into laughter for the look she gives me as if I am deprived of an essential blessing in my life. Sigh!
Asma Raza Aslam (Batch of 2019)
In this society of interwoven family system that we live in, being married, engaged or committed is not an easy job. However, staying single is even more difficult. We love poking our nose into other's business, ignoring the mess that is going in our own life. Be it a family gathering or any wedding that you are attending, all the aunties have their eyes on you. If a girl is married, when is she having a baby or how is she being treated by her in-laws and a never-ending plethora of questions follows. But if she is 25 and still single, OMG, that trigger a rapid-fire alarm in aunties’ mind asking you five 'W's, who, when, what, where, why.
Call it my luck, I was born surrounded by the same aunties. When I first opened my eyes, my Phupho declared that I would make a perfect match for her son who was 12 years at that time. It was after listening to this that I cried and my APGAR score increased. Thanks to that Umair Bhai who later eloped with his class fellow when I was in school. I could set myself up with some of my cousins that I like if only I weren't calling them ‘Bhai' since childhood.
When I crossed twenty, my mom started taking me to weddings and to small gatherings treating me as an adult while deep down I am still the three years old who loves wheat flavored Cerelac. I have experienced the typical questions aunties ask in gatherings to all the potentially single girls, and if they are doctors, it adds to the fuel. I was attending a wedding when an Aunty asked if I was single and started reading the CV of her son. I gave a fake smile and changed the table, ending up sitting with an apparently decent lady. She asked if I had graduated. Without thinking about what she had asked, I said, “happily married, have a beautiful daughter.” “But you look,” she astonishingly said, “old enough to have two kids!” I replied to her sentence with a sarcastic smile. In that instant, my mom showed out of nowhere and introduced me to the same lady I already had lied to. She was her friend and knew me. I was really embarrassed.
Even though my Instagram is flooded with pictures of people getting married, nikah-fied or at least engaged, I comfortably lie in bed, binge-watching Netflix originals and eating noodles while commenting MashaAllah on somebody changing her status from single to married. Whereas my mom is from head to heels trying to find me a perfect match. She asks me every week, “tell me freely beta if you like any of your class-fellows”. I tell her every time that we don't have Boys in FJ. A silence of a few seconds intervenes before I burst into laughter for the look she gives me as if I am deprived of an essential blessing in my life. Sigh!
Asma Raza Aslam (Batch of 2019)
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