Cheap blood (BOTM August)

This is the entry for blog of the month August.

Don't remember a lot but the moment I came to know my existence, I was lying on this tiny field of grass. Never did I bother to see what’s beyond its four borders. Everyday and every night I just make a lot of efforts to make it bloom more and more with beautiful flowers and small cute plants. Its my everything though it may appear cheap but still my world I say.

One day while lying down, I gazed beyond the borders where I saw some more fields like mine. I was so happy to know, I jumped with joy and started moving to the fields nearby. Then I saw a girl waving her hand, she called me to her big lush field. So beautiful it was, I am sure she did work harder than me. l felt inferior to her but as she started talking she was so nice and timid. We became friends always laughing, talking, enjoying on our fields. Mine wasn't as nice as her's but we got along fine. One day she disappeared without a word and someone else replaced her field. I wanted to know why? 

Maybe I never deserved kindness, while wondering this and walking around, I saw a field filled with weeds and shrubs affecting its beauty. I thought I should help them so I went in, there was a little kid. I told him that these weeds will affect his field and I will help him remove them (showing kindness). I blushed but the kid laughed and said such cheap blood of yours is not required. I was amazed as if I had heard something wrong. It didn't take long until I was surrounded by a bunch of bullies who started beating me to the pulp but why why me? The only words I heard were,"you cheap! you think your life matters? you better die a thousand times in your tiny field bleeding but even then, thank you for being our punch bag for today". I fainted. When I woke up, I was on my field bleeding heavily. I somehow got up, wept and screamed hard. I know my field is tiny but still does it actually matter. I never knew that being kind can be that painful but still I will admire her while protecting my field....

.....(today) I am still confused you know and yes I came to know where did that girl shift. She lives in a field very far apart from here but its good to know that she is fine. And today I am writing a letter to her. I am sure you will laugh while reading it but it’s okay I will tell you all.

"Hello how are you? I am doing fine here. I miss you a lot though. I have got a lot of new friends, so many but very few of them are as nice as you and you know I just recently broke up with them. They always just came and ruined my field and call it a cheap place to live without knowing all the efforts I ever put, the times I bleed, the times I wept to make it grow so beautiful. They actually don't have the eyes for it so I just clearly told them to leave. Yes they got angry and said that I will be left alone forever and I won't have any one to talk to but I just said, "it’s better to remain in my cheap world rather than getting hurt by the likes of you, I’d rather shed my blood to make this cheap life of mine bloom than getting hurt by you". On hearing that they laughed, made fun of me and left. Now I am left with very few friends but still I am happy. What do you think, was it the right thing to do? I am happy to be me rather than acting like someone else. Ahh I am waiting for your reply and your visit as well and don't forget to help me grow those roses, the black ones, you promised me. Waiting." 

Please don't laugh at me. I know I might be nothing but a little grain of sand with my so called tiny field but that’s it that’s the life I have something that is precious to me. I will protect it with my so called cheap blood, I daresay.

Anam Zahra.

Batch of 2022.

FJITE.