With love, your future self

Sunny, stormy or rainy, the weather couldn't stop me from my morning jog. Neither could the fact of being home alone could serve as a hinderance. Returning from the jog, as I reached the locked door of my house, I found something lying by the doorstep. An envelope. I picked it up. It had an unusual texture and an odd blue colour. I turned it around and saw my name and address written on it. There was another thing written that left me shocked- the date it was sent. It was August 23, 2057.

I smiled. It must have been some prank by my friends. Deciding to play along, I opened the envelope. It was a letter and quite a long one. I'd never been a big fan of lengthy writings. Sighing, I started reading it.

 

Dear self,

I am you from the future. You must be shocked and amused thinking it’s a prank. But the me I know will not consider it totally impossible. After all, it's future technology!

I won't be telling you about the details but there are some things I'd like you to know, some regrets I have that I want you to amend, some obscure obstacles I discovered so late in my life, too late.

Though you’re not a fan of lengthy writings, please bear it this time. It’s important. It’s necessary.

Right now, you have this letter in one hand and your cell phone in the other. You are mostly like that. You're always spending your time addicted to this technology. We have much better phones in the future. But my regret is this technology. The past me, that is you, spent too much time on it. You ignored everyone around you and as time passed, as days flew by, the technology remained and even improved, but your surroundings changed, just like a tree sheds its leaves in the autumn and gets new ones in the spring. But your loved ones are not like that. Some things, some people, have no replacement at all, and the past me never learned to appreciate them. Try to understand, cherié, it's a big regret.

You're always whining about the problems in your life. You always want the time to pass. Pass matric in flying colours. Get the top position in intermediate. Get admission in MBBS and survive the five years of the university. Survive every test and every exam. That's your goal, right?

Let me tell you, dear self! You will become a doctor. You'll pass some exams and fail to clear some. C'est la vie! But there's something you failed to decipher. The problems are always there. They constitute your life! But time is flying. And by whining, you lose your time.

What I regret right now is the party you missed because you were too busy fussing over a substage, the competition you never participated in because you never wanted to lose your perfect attendance, the things you never did because you were hindered by these little obstacles in your way. 

I need you to enjoy life. I need you to enjoy your life with the problems and cherish every moment. You will manage to survive the exams, the problems. But you'll regret missing what you'd have loved to do.

There is another thing I want to tell you. Learn to accept yourself. Accept yourself with all your fears, your complexes, your insecurities. Learn to look at yourself in the mirror. Look into your eyes and appreciate yourself, your original self who only you out of all the people know.

Only then will you be able to understand and love those around you. Forgive yourself for your mistakes first, then it will be easier to forgive others when they wrong you. 

And the most important thing, my dear, is that never lose hope. Hope with every breath You take. And whenever you are distressed, call Him. He is always here to listen. And He says it Himself that He listens whenever someone calls him. Then why don't you? Why are you so hopeless? Learn to hope and learn to cry to Him when you are distressed and feel that tinge of hopelessness. 

I know you get distant. I know you get the inferiority complex. I know you think that you are not worthy enough to call Him because of your misdeeds. It's not like that, dear self, it is not like that. Cry to him when you have the chance. Tell Him your worries. Tell Him your deepest fears and insecurities and He'll help you. Do not doubt that.

As I conclude this letter, I am standing in the park outside our school. I am standing next to the old maple tree. If you get this letter, I need you to carve on it a little message for me, so that I know that you understood my letter. I have invested so much in this letter; not just money, but also my heart and my soul. So please, do give me a reply.

The future is bright, my dear self, only if you are optimistic enough. Learn to laugh in the face of your fear. And learn to love and appreciate all the beautiful things in your life.

With love,

Your future self.

 

I read that letter once. Then I read it again. Again and again. It had my signatures on it. Yet, I didn't quite believe that it was from the future. Such technology should be impossible, right? And before that little contradictory part of me took charge, I decided to investigate. I asked everyone, my friends and fellows, and even my colleagues, but nobody had the slightest idea. Eventually, everyone forgot, but the letter remained on the back of my mind.

And eventually, its contents got inculcated in my life.

Initially, I thought that replying to it by carving on a tree was ridiculous. But one day, as I was standing by the old maple tree, I finally manage to do it. I managed to carve a reply message, saying: 

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May 31, 2061

It was a sunny morning. I was in my hometown nowadays. My morning jogging course today was that of my childhood- from home to school and back. Catching my breath, I sat on the bench in the park when I saw it, the message I had written for myself. I walked towards and traced it with my fingers. 

Nostalgia. Yes, I felt that.

A smile crept on my lips. I never wrote that letter, did I? I’d never learnt who wrote that letter. Whoever they were, they must have been some psychological freaks, because they were so right. 

The technology has advanced so much but not enough to send letters from the future.

Maybe I'll never learn who this benefactor of mine was but they sure changed my life. They made me appreciate so much that I might have ignored if it weren't for them. They made me live my life to its fullest and now that I think of it, It’s not such a bad idea. Maybe, I'll write it for someone too- the cranky little girl next door or the socially isolated boy that lives downstairs. Yes, I am going to make them receive a letter: a letter to them by their future selves. They'll think it's magical. It'll change their lives. And it sure will make my eyes sparkle again, with the compassion of a parent and the excitement of a child.

Maryam Ejaz (Batch of 2020)